`*``*A WoRlD oF mY LiTtLe SiLlY AcTs & a BiG PiEcE oF ThouGht ~`*``*
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Just to Let yOu kNoW
Snoopy See, Snoopy Do
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wat and who is Leo qi de now ? i questioned myself ..... the more i wanna find out, the more depressed and confused i got. i felt im like a living dead in this world ... souless, meaningless. i have my studies, my hobbies and friends all around me, i don short of any good things in life, but i cant help it but to feel like im just dead.
2 years ago, when i met her, my world was brightened up, i lived with love and care always, never had i once touched the magics of love till then. 2 years later, she left me for good, knew that i wasnt a good boyfriend for her. i regretted that i couldnt treat her better, be the man she wanna me to be. my world came crushing down ......
james chatted with me on msn few days ago ...... he told me about the thoughts and feelings he had about me since i came back from taiwan, was kinda shocked to hear the changes he noticed, even i didnt notice. am trying to recall back, then i realise, i have locked myself in that beautiful past of mine. i just don wan to go out of it ...... every moment, every second im enjoying it, if i can, i will never wanna get out of it.
i've have been trying to hide, trying to cheat, trying to lie to myself, i don like her anymore. its almost 1/2 year since we broke off, the efforts were put to waste. i don know how can i shake the shadows off me .... maybe like wat bunnie told me, there are 2 ways to do it, love someone else to forget her or two ..... lock your heart and throw the key away, so that no one can access to it. seems like a feasible idea to me though .... not much diff from wat im doing now.
im a weakling, a fucking WEAKLING ! crying in my room every now and then, thinking of her ........ but who would understand ? i wish that i can meet with an accident, left me in coma and never wake up, or simply give me a brain wash ........
really hoping to look forward to my happy days again ...
